one, two, three
by Setkia
Summary: "I'm 33% certain I'm in love with you." Sanji blinks. "Only 33%? I'm disappointed in you, Marimo." A collection of 100 one-shots inspired by one-worded prompts.
1. Chapter 1

**_Author's Note #1_** _: So I've always wanted to make a collection of one-shots that would end with having 100 chapters and I finally figured out how to do it. I will be using a prompt-list. The one-shots will vary from drabbles, to actual full-length one-shots. I found this list online on a wordpress blog. And without further ado, here is the first one. Now, which pairing can I do 100 one-shots for and never be bored, nor run out of ideas? Well that's a pretty easy one. Zoro and Sanji, of course! You never know, I might elaborate on one and make it a story. I don't own_ ** _One Piece._** _Please review. Let me know if you're going to read this in the long-run, cause it's going to be a long story. 100 chapters worth of ZoSan or SanZo. For now it'll be rated T, it might get upped, depending on things. I'm not concentrating on length right now, I'm just seeing where the prompt takes me. Also, is it just me or should there be a ZoSan/SanZo competition? For the best story? Other authors in other fandoms get to brag about how awesome their story is, ranking in insert-place-here in insert-competition-here and we don't get to do it. Anyone willing to come up with a competition we could do?_

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 ** _one, two, three_**  
 _by: Setkia_

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prompt #1: introduction

 _length: 340 words_

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The first time Sanji sees him, he's bleeding out.

Well no, that's not right, he saw the swordsman with the green hair sitting at a table at the Baratie, watching his captain drink down a fly. But when his chest gets cut open and he falls into the ocean, that's the first time he truly sees him.

Sees his ambition, sees his drive, can tell he's really going to do something so outrageous as to challenge the greatest swordsman in the world who just cut down over a thousand men because he was bored, in order to get stronger.

It's not until long after the man has stitches going diagonally along his chest and they've brought down Arlong that he's able to properly introduce himself.

"My name's Sanji," he tells him. "I'm going to be the ship's new cook."

"Tch," is the only answer he gets back, but the man shakes his hand roughly. He can really get a feel for who a man is from the way he shakes someone's hand. Or the fact that someone like Roronoa Zoro will even shake your hand says that appearances can be deceiving. At least, that's what he thinks until the swordsman later tells him it was because he looked so pathetic standing there the green haired man figured he'd at least shake the love-cook's hand to shut him up.

During the first time they put him on watch he and the Marimo have their first ever true conversation. And it's interesting and the man opens up to him in ways he never thought he ever would. He lays everything on the table, a take-it-or-leave-it sort of deal and Sanji doesn't know how to respond by saying anything other than his own whole truth and story, which the swordsman listens to very carefully.

This is a new life and Sanji is okay with this.

They drink together that night and he silently drinks to a new beginning.

The burning taste of alcohol has never been so sweet.

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 ** _Author's Note #2:_** _To all those readers who write, I am submitting a challenge to you: write a ZoSan or SanZo story (don't care, smut, no smut, whatever, top, bottom, whatever) using the prompt "bandana" and including the phrase "It's like toothpaste, it's out of the tube!". I wanna see how many of you could write something like that. If you want to, that is. Send me a PM if you decide to do it and the link to it once it's done. I await responses. Hopefully._


	2. Chapter 2

_**Author's Note #1:**_ _I don't own_ _ **One Piece.**_ _I had fun with these. Most of these stories will probably be drabbles ... I'm also thinking of doing an alphabet story too. Or try a month-long challenge where I post every day. Gotta choose a month that isn't hard to update in though ... maybe February. It's a short month. What do you guys think?_

* * *

 _ **one, two, three**_ _  
by: Setkia_

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prompt #2: complicated

 _length: 377 words_

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Roronoa Zoro leads a simple life.

Before he joins the Straw Hats, he's a bounty hunter, just rallying them in to get enough food for his next meal. He goes from village to village, meets a couple of people along the way and consumes more sake than healthy.

When he joins the Straw Hats he sees his job as simple: fight the bad guys, make Luffy Pirate King, become the greatest swordsman in the world and keep getting stronger. It's really as simple as that.

When Nami unofficially joins in, things are again, simple. She's a girl, a bitch, she likes money. Simple.

When he meets Usopp, he learns a few more things that he finds are important such as being truthful and then maybe every now and then lies are sweeter than the truth. His life is still simple, now there's just a new guy around who fires cannonballs at shit and watches them blow up.

When he enters the Baratie things are still simple. It's the last time things are so simple.

When he meets the blond his entire world flips and not in the good way when his stomach does weird things cause the alcohol finally goes to his head; more like flipping the way his stomach lurches on the rare occasions he gets a hangover.

He tries to dumb the cook down. He's blond, he smokes, he likes women. That's simple enough, isn't it? Except then he hears about his story about being stranded on an island and he wonders how the cook hasn't given up on the ocean.

The cook is a combination of distractions and strange mixed parts, of being flirty and serious, of being stressed and yet so relaxed, of liking seafood and hating the smell of fish. It's weird as fuck and he doesn't know what to make of it.

One day he sees the cook on the deck as usual, chanting sweet nothings to Nami and he decides he'll just stick a label on him as he usually does on others. It's easy.

Blond.

Idiot.

Cook.

Smokes.

Fighter.

Lovesick.

Good. Now the blond is simple to him again. That was too much of a hassle.

And then the cook has to kiss him and complicate things all over again.

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2:**_ _The thank-yous!_

 _HollyWoodFix_ _: I don't know, have you checked out Sink or Swim, or Tag by any chance? You should definitely try it, I think of challenges as some of the most fun. I mean writing's always fun, but it adds a bit of spice, doesn't it?_

 _lost green tiger:_ _Well, you could still write for it if you want. You can send it to me, I have my e-mail on my profile. Otherwise you could make an account or something._

 _KurAchua Hing_ _: I don't mind, I'm glad you decided to read outside of your usual tongue. I keep telling myself I'll try to read French or Spanish things, but I just can't do it. I lose a certain fluidity, get what I mean? For some reason, I find an uke Zoro to be one of the HOTTEST things ever, probably because he's so prideful and it's so not his place, so the fact that I'm able to imagine him that way ... Anyway, you're right, one step at a time._

 _We are so blessed in this fandom that our pairing does not have a stupid name. I mean Peetniss? Percabeth? I love both couples but seriously, the names sound stupid. That's why I say I ship Everllark, it sounds so much better. It'll take a while to get Chasson trending, but I'll try. If anyone's interested in the challenge, PM me about it! Or e-mail me, my e-mail's on my profile. I'm a needy person who wants love so ... yeah._


	3. Chapter 3

**_Author's Note #1:_** _I don't really like this one, but I wrote it anyway. I'm actually really psyched for the fourth one, so I'm working on that. I don't own_ ** _One Piece._** _I am also working on a one-shot of the challenge I myself proposed. Wow … I think I have no life. I also have a 15 chapter story planned. I think I'll finish_ ** _Sink or Swim,_** _then finish_ ** _Speechless_** _, then write the 15 chapter story and THEN get onto_ ** _Escort Me_** _._ ** _Speechless_** _finally has an ending planned!_

* * *

 _ **one, two, three**_ _  
by: Setkia_

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prompt #3: making history

 _length: 418 words_

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Perhaps they're conceited, thinking they're riding on the ship of the Pirate King. Not because he will become the Pirate King, but because as far as the two strongest members of the crew (aside from the captain of course) he's already gotten the title. It may be because their captain says it with such conviction, but they're both certain that when it comes to the end of the fight on the Grand Line they'll definitely be crew members of the Pirate King.

Members of the Pirate King's crew have to have great titles too.

He's not going to try to become the greatest swordsman, he _will_ be the greatest swordsman because the Pirate King will have no one less on their crew.

He's not going to attempt to find the All Blue, he'll find it., 100% because the Pirate King can't have a cook without ambition.

They don't need to try and make history: they've already made it.

That's why when someone tells them that they will be Pirate King, they shake their heads and look towards their captain. Both know they could be leaders, they are leaders within the crew, but no one will ever go against the idea of Luffy being captain.

Sure, he declared it on them suddenly, but that's because it was meant to be.

Roronoa Zoro will never be Pirate King.

Neither will Sanji Vinsmoke.

But Monkey D. Luffy was meant to be Pirate King, right from the beginning and his landing on Alvida's ship in a barrel was just God's way of accepting that Gol D. Roger's successor would be the one with the straw hat.

No one will ever commit mutiny on the Thousand Sunny because they couldn't imagine doing something like that to the captain.

The reason why the other crews won't make it, it's because they don't have the same devotion. The crew members of that crew aren't nearly as much like nakama as their crew is. Every member of the Straw Hats have their own goals; they don't want the title of Pirate King. They are too indebted to Luffy to ever think of betraying him. Sure, they could say the Whitebeard pirates had such a drive, but the end still said ti clearly: their downfall was in part because of betrayal amongst their own members.

The Straw Hats will be the next pirates on the seas to have a captain with the title of Pirate King because history has been made and no one can change that.

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 ** _Author's Note #2:_** _The thank-yous!_

 _KurAcha Hing_ _: Sorry for the mistake!_

 _cystalbluefox_ _: Would you be up for the challenge proposed in chapter 1? I would be interested to see what you'd come up with. Anyway, thank you for checking out this story as well. As you are well aware, I worship the ground you walk on._

 _Just wanted to let you all know_ ** _Beautiful Disaster_** _is on the 4th page of most favorited stories in the ZoSan/SanZo community and I am so happy about it! You guys have really made me happy and proud of my story._


	4. Chapter 4

**_Author's Note #1:_** _Okay, so I kinda got sucked into_ ** _Doctor Who_** _. I wondered why I stopped. I got till season 2, finished it last night and if you'd believe me, I finished season 3 a few minutes ago. I was just like Rose, couldn't see, I was crying to hard. And then besides shipping David Tennant and Billie Piper, I was just like, "Jack Harkness is gay, right? Or bisexual?" And then I was obsessed with him and David Tennant making out, which I so wish would happen. My friend thinks David Tennant and Captain Jack are the hottest men alive. I don't blame her. Now the reason why I chose this 100 word prompt list as opposed to any other was because of this prompt. I'm still high off of the whole travelling through space. I think the intro is a scene that is designed to hypnotize you. Don't own_ ** _One Piece._** _I swear, I'm hearing everything in a British accent now._

* * *

 ** _one, two, three  
_** _by: Setkia_

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prompt #4: rivalry

 _length: 687 words_

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In Roronoa Zoro's humble opinion, rivalries were stupid. They were a waste of time and energy and he would not allow himself to stoop to such a level; obtaining the title of the world's greatest swordsman was no small feat and he would not allow himself to be distracted along the way because of a measly competition.

Roronoa Zoro did not hold grudges. He saw no point in them.

If he were to call anyone his rival he supposed he would call Mihawk his rival, but rivals were supposed to be people you lost to who were equal in skill, thus making the loss so infuriating, thus creating the rivalry and Zoro wasn't so conceited to think he was on the same level as Mihawk. Yet.

So Zoro didn't hold any grudges and had no rivalries and all was well for the swordsman of the Straw Hat Pirates.

Until someone stole the last bottle of sake from the galley.

"Oi, Shit-Cook!"

The blond appeared before him, bouncy as always and full of love for those bitches on the crew. "What do you want?" he asked, a leer in his tone. Zoro couldn't understand what it was that Sanji held against him, but he didn't like it. And furthermore that just made it all the more likely that he had stolen the last bottle. Zoro needed that bottle to stay sane on the nut-house boat.

"Where's the last of the sake?"

"I don't know, probably in your stomach, you addict."

Zoro grit his teeth. "You probably used it for some stupid recipe—"

"I didn't touch your goddamn beer, alright?" demanded Sanji, stepping closer to Zoro.

"You totally did!"

"I did not! I'm not a liar, Marimo!"

They got closer and closer, up in each other's faces until they were spitting in the other's face, eyes narrowed and intense glares.

"Give it back!"

"I don't have it!"

"Idiot, don't lie to me!"

"Shouldn't you learn to be independent of such things?"

"I'm calling Luffy!"

"Oh, that's mature!"

Zoro huffed, crossed his arms and screamed for Luffy. Surely the captain would sort out the whole ordeal. He leaned closer to Sanji, watching as the cook's nostrils flared. He would give it up soon, confess to having been the one to take the sake.

And then Sanji kissed him.

He grabbed Zoro's head and pulled him closer, attacking his lips heavily. Breathing was harsh as he wrapped a leg around Zoro's waist and forced Zoro to carry his weight, not that the swordsman minded. He fought back just as violently as Sanji delivered, his hand snaking all over his body, grabbing at clothes, almost ripping off his blazer.

If there were to be a bystander, it looked as though Sanji was climbing all over Zoro's body, while Zoro tried to climb up Sanji's body, both clinging desperately. They parted for a moment of air.

"Got shitty lungs too, don't you?" sneered Zoro, but he was grinning far too widely.

"You're all red in the face, you've got no room to talk!" Sanji snapped, pulling at Zoro's head almost too harshly, exposing the tanned neck. Almost like a vampire draining a victim of blood, Sanji's lips attached themselves to the slope of Zoro's neck and Zoro could do nothing but cling tighter to him and moan, pressing his face into his body. He licked his lips and pulled Sanji by his hair so he could meet his lips.

Zoro's hands made quick work of Sanji's flimsy tie, using it to pull him closer before nearly tearing it to shreds. Sanji was taking off his blazer, throwing it away before long. Zoro's shirt was being pushed up and it was just so hot, _too_ hot, he couldn't breathe—

"You called, but it seems you're busy …"

Both men froze, Zoro's pants riding low, Sanji's shirt mostly unbuttoned, hair mussed, out of breath and gasping for air. Wide eyed and desperation leaking from both of them. Zoro and Sanji both heaved in shaky breaths of air, before their eyes settled on one thing.

In Luffy's right hand was the last bottle of sake.

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 ** _Author's Note #2:_** _The thank-yous!_

 _Shizuka Taiyou (x3)_ : _Yeah, I was surprised finding out he's got a name. Nami and Usopp annoy me slightly and that's cause they don't have last names. Also, the fact that women get an eye colour and men don't. That just leaves us guessing what colour eyes Zoro has to hypnotize you._

 _MawVax_ _: I hope this as nicer._

 _So I guess, since I'm all sonic screwdriver, blue box, TARDIS obsessed at the moment, I'll ask you this: how many of you have seen_ ** _Doctor Who?_** _I think David Tennant's brilliant really. (I've been watching it so much, I'm reading my writing in my head with a British accent.) Also, I'm considering checking out_ ** _Merlin_** _. Do you think it's worth it? Since I know the whole ending and all. By accident. Haven't been sleeping much lately, so I've just been reading fan fictions for shows I've never seen and_ ** _Merlin_** _was one of them. Merlin is cute though._


	5. Chapter 5

_**Author's Note #1:** I don't own **One Piece.** Actually haven't watched it in a while. But to be honest, I've been skimming through **Haikyūu** and BBC. **Doctor Who** , I started to watch **Merlin** like, 2 days ago. And I read fanfiction before I saw it and in my opinion, Arthur and Merlin are so frigging gay. And I ship it so hard, even if I know technically Arthur's already Gwen's. No spoilers, only seen like, 2 episodes. I have an idea for an AU though if anyone would be interested, once I get my feet more firmly planted. I don't know why I just assume that everyone likes the same things I do, if my audience has such strange tastes ... Moving on... This episode is really one that struck me really hard and I really liked it. 377, I will forever remember, along with episode 483. I hope you guys like it, please review. Starting school tomorrow ... oh dear and first period is chemistry._

* * *

 ** _one, two, three  
_** _by: Setkia_

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prompt #5: unbreakable

 _length: 389 words_

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In Sanji's mind Roronoa Zoro is invincible. He can not be shaken by something like pain, can not falter because of something as insignificant as failure. He pushes through, lives through the pain and the madness and the strange occurrences. You have to if you're going to live on the Grand Line.

He's heard that before his appearance on Little Garden, Zoro had been in the process of chopping off his own legs without a second thought in order to get out alive.

He's heard his past, knows of all the reasons Zoro sailed the sea, knows the burden and worries he carries with him that he's never let put him down, he uses them to make himself stronger.

He's seen Zoro get lost and somehow always find his way back.

He's seen the man watch as his sword deteriorates before his very eyes and he just keeps going.

He's seen him fight opponents who are bigger, tougher, and watches him leave scarred but stronger, greater.

He's learnt he never lets his guard down with how he deals with Baroque Works at Whiskey Peak.

He's seen his sentimentality (the one and only time he has ever seen Zoro cry) proclaiming to the skies that he will never lose another battle for his captain, the King of the Pirates.

And above all, Sanji has seen as Zoro fights the world's greatest swordsman and refuses a scar on his back (it's a symbol of shame for a swordsman). He watches him get split wide open by that giant sword, watches him fall into the ocean and come back out alive, barely even reacting to the whole ordeal.

So it isn't wrong of Sanji to assume Zoro is strong. But this is something he has never seen.

He doesn't know what happened between Zoro and Kuma, doesn't know what deal they made that Luffy is still alive, but now, more than the image of a wide-open Zoro, freshly cut by Mihawk's sword, it's the image of a bloodied and bruised Zoro, bandages still wrapped around him from his fight on Thriller Bark, gritting his teeth, blood in his mouth, eyes dark, swaying, on the brink of death, and yet still telling him nothing's happened.

Zoro isn't invincible, he isn't unbreakable because the moment Sanji comes closer he watches Zoro fall forwards.

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 _ **Au** **thor's Note #2** : The thank-you, because no one likes to review to this story, apparently._

 _Shizuka Taiyou: I always go with grey since it's like steel and his eyes are pretty dark. I mean there's always green, but at the same time with green hair and pants that look green in certain lighting and a green haramaki, does he really need green eyes? In one shot in the anime, there's a scene that focuses on Sanji's eyes and they're like a blue grey colour or so I'm told. I love reading miscellaneous crap about characters I like._

 _Please review. Also, if you haven't, check out **if my heart was a house.**_


	6. Chapter 6

_**Author's Note #1** : I can admit it. I have been a horrible author recently. I've gotten swept up into the **Marvel** universe, got side-tracked by **Yuri On Ice** and **HQ** fics I haven't updated in a long time, right after I said I'd be back in **One Piece**. Right now this is the only story I can properly manage until I get myself under control. I know it seems like the only time I was even remotely productive was that one summer when I wrote **Beautiful Disaster,** and I'm sorry for that. I'm working on getting better, at making a proper schedule and not getting sidetracked. I read back **Sink or Swim** and I really love it (which I can't say about a lot of the things I write, even the things I publish) so I will try and work on the next chapter for you guys, really I will. I just hope you can put up with me as I try to shuffle my way through this. I start too many projects without considering how possible it is for me to finish them and that's my fault, I know that. I wish I could delete the stories and come back to them once I have a better handle on it, but I don't think I can, I consider that to be wrong. I know if I do, I'll just go back and delete them and never finish projects, so they're staying up, as a reminder to myself that I owe you guys more and you guys deserve better and trust me, I'm trying. So expects updates for this story only for the time being, until I've got my head on straight. I don't own **One Piece.**_

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 ** _one, two, three  
_** _by: Setkia_

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prompt #6: obsession

 _length: 271 words_

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Sanji is inclined to judge a man by his handshake. Sanji judges cooks based on their hands, on their fingers, on how many calluses they have, on how tightly they hold their whisk. If someone were to say Sanji has an obsession with hands, they wouldn't be wrong, necessarily.

Zoro on the other hand, he has no need for an obsession with hands. Make sure he still has them and that he can hold his swords in his hands, that's all it is. He has no reason to obsess over the length of fingers, or the state of someone's nails. At least, no _good_ reason.

And yet he stares at Sanji's fingers as if they've personally offended him, or as if he were entranced, completely overtaken with an overwhelming curiosity. Why, Sanji has no idea.

There's something about the way he holds a cigarette.

He thinks that if he spends too much time contemplating why he's thinking in that way, he might not be happy with what he finds, so he tries to avoid thinking about it.

But it's almost impossible since his eyes are drawn towards his fingers as they move when he talks, when he breathes in for his cigarette, when he places his hands on the table to emphasize his point, it's impossible.

So maybe Zoro knows Sanji's hands better than he knows his own.

When Sanji comes back from the store holding the groceries, maybe Zoro's eyes zero in on his fingers a bit too much, but then something in his stomach drops right out and he freezes.

Sanji's fingers are _not_ meant to bend that way

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 _ **Author's Note #2** : The thank-yous!_

 _Guest : Thanks!_

 _Again, really sorry you guys. I'm trying to sort this out. I totally get it if you're pissed at me._


	7. Chapter 7

_**Author's Note #1** : I know I said I was back and I haven't updated, but to be fair, I haven't updated like ANYTHING while I was gone. Um... Don't own **One Piece**. Got to Punk Hazard ... Law is awesome._

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 ** _one, two, three_**  
 _by: Setkia_

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prompt #7: eternity

 _length: 465 words_

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Two years. It had only been 730 days since he had last seen his captain. Perhaps had it been a normal two years, he wouldn't be as relieved as he was but those 104 weeks away had been absolute hell.

The captain had changed. Everyone had changed, but the one standing in front of him was the biggest by far.

"Where the fuck is your eye?"

"The fuck is up with your eyebrows?"

It was like two years of arguments had built up to this moment. So much so that Sanji felt like he was on fire. The marimo had only his hair and his scowl in common with his former self.

Sanji didn't like to exaggerate, but clearly, he had changed drastically. He wasn't sure if he'd call it a negative thing, but he supposed environments caused such a large difference.

One thing remained the same though.

"You're paler!"

"You're harrier!"

"Your forehead got bigger!"

"Your eyebrow is swirly-er!"

"How the hell did you get here first?"

"Why is your nose bleeding?"

Sanji backed up a moment and gently touched his nose. Pulling his fingers away from himself, he saw red on the tips of his hands. His eyes widened in surprise.

It felt like forever since Sanji had seen a woman, but more importantly, seen a man who dressed like a man and acted like a man. Zoro was manly. That was a fact. Sanji was pretty sure he didn't lose anything in saying that.

He had missed many things while he was away. Nami-chan, Robin-san, of course, but also the way the idiot's forehead throbbed when he got pissed. The way he'd lash out and his voice would raise a bit higher when he got more unreasonable and started yelling at him. The way he'd claim the ground had moved and it wasn't his fault the port changed location.

In all honesty, Sanji had missed Zoro.

Though they butted heads, Sanji was pretty sure Zoro was his best friend on the crew. They were closest in age and had each shared their own personal, traumatizing stories with one another. Though not all knew of Sanji's dreaded time on that island, Zoro did. And Sanji was pretty sure Zoro had never spoken a word about Kuina before to anyone other than him, if not perhaps Luffy.

Perhaps Sanji had even missed Zoro most of all.

His best friend, his rival, and his equal.

But he'd die before he told him that.

"We gotta find the captain, Shit-Cook."

"I'll lead, you'll probably get us lost."

"OI!"

Sanji chuckled.

"The hell, Curlicue?!"

"Nothing," Sanji said, lighting up a new cigarette and tasting it on his tongue. The first cigarette of many in the presence of friends once again. "Let's go."

 _It's good to be back._

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 _ **Author's Note #2:** The thank-yous!_

 _Pinapples : Yeah, I've just gotten into the habit of asking questions. Hope you've checked out **Beautiful Disaster** then._

 _Ashlielle : Um ... dun dun dun?_

 _HokkyouNoOkami (x2) : Luffy drinks. Occasionally. Yup, I'm working on updating._

 _Okay, question ... question ...okay imagine real life situation, there's a fight amongst the Straw Hats, but like, real life. So no Devil Fruits, and I'll say Franky's like ... part robot, but not to like the extent he usually is. Also, consider that Nami's ClimaTact would've been able to do much, it'd be more like a giant staff that occasionally makes wind by moving it quickly. So real world application onto the Straw Hats, who would win in a fight?_


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